Gym Bat Log

It’s a little hard to believe how much burpees have improved my endurance. Today, I did a declining ladder starting at twelve, with treadmill rest periods, which became to sprints on starting at six. (I had to cut out box-jumps though, replacing them with plank-jacks, because  box-jumps seem to have upset my knee – might try to get back to them in a bit.) That shit would’ve pretty much killed me a few weeks ago. But tonight?

Not so much.

Like, don’t get me wrong. I was tired and sweaty and shit after the burpees but felt like I could do more so I did a pyramid of bicep curls, starting at five and moving by fives up to twenty-five then down again, with fifteen pound weights and treadmill-jogging-rest with squats every ten seconds.

Then did some of these things . . .

I have no idea what the fuck these are even called. But, goddamn, they hurt!

(Also, that’s not a video so don’t worry too much about pressing the button to no result. I can’t figure out how to embed Instagram videos here. You can find the video here if you want. But, be warned, lady fitness instagram is a crazy house. I have no idea how these people do what they do or how/why they smile while doing it. Hilary Swank is trying to kill me and the lady above isn’t much better – she might even be worse. These must be some sort of sadists. Very cheerful sadists.)

What I do with these things is a declining ladder that starts two reps of seven. So I stack seven on my shins, unstack them, stack them again, unstack them again and that’s one. Next one is six. All the way down to zero. I like doing them that way because it makes me feel like I’m actually making progress and it’s somehow very satisfying to toss those stack things to the side like the horrible garbage they are. But, man, during this, I made some noises no human should ever make. My torso felt like it was on fire.

After that, I finished with five thirty second farmer’s walks of two thirty pound dumbbells with 45 second rest periods. These farmer’s walks are one of the most practical things I do. My job involves a lot of carrying and this shit really helps.

After all that, I still felt like I could do more but I also felt like I was really going to feel what I’d already done so I decided to pack it in and stretch.

Burpees, those motherfuckers work.

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